Post by dirtymexicanheeb on Jun 7, 2013 11:18:58 GMT -5
Welcome to Celebrity Mafia!
Kill off the trashy "stars" and reclaim Hollywood once and for all!
Can’t tell us apart? Mary-Kate is the skinny one and Ashley is the fat one. Do your homework. If you want to stick around and survive this game we both enjoy a venti, non-fat, no foam, no water, 6 pump, extra hot, chai tea latte.
Residents of Los Angeles a.k.a. Tinsel Towniez
Denzel Washington a.k.a Town Mayor and Secksy Beast
You must gather your residents together to stop the evil reality m'orons from taking over! You’ve played every role imaginable so you’re obviously qualified for crime fighting. You are loved and respected by all; you basically can do no wrong. Also...can we get the name of your dentist? Those are some stellar chompers.
Gary Busey a.k.a The Town Fool
You’re like a mad genius. No one can figure out if you’re a beautiful mind or just cuckoo for cocoa puffs but somehow you make it work. You will be given “the gossip” each night cycle and it’s up to you whether or not to believe it. Beware of F.E.A.R. – False Evidence Appearing Real.
*secret*
Amy Adams a.k.a The Girl Next Door
Who doesn't love Amy Adams?! It’s got to be that hair…or the smile…or the fact that cartoon birds flock to her on command…
Jillian Michaels a.k.a The One They Love To Hate
Don’t listen to the h8erz, Jillian. You’re hot and deep down inside everyone wishes they were you. Plus…you make grown men cry like it’s no one’s business.
Maggie Smith a.k.a The Town Elder
Everyone in the town respects you. Everyone. You’re in both Harry Potter AND Downton Abbey. All you do is win.
Neil Patrick Harris a.k.a. Mr. Boss
Suit up! Because you're legen...wait for it...dary.
Sofia Vergara a.k.a. The Jaw Dropper
You're beautiful, funny, smart...keep drinking that Diet Pepsi, girl.
Alec Baldwin a.k.a The Frickin Man
Let’s face it, you’re the only Baldwin who matters. It's like you never even left that cray cray message on Ireland's voicemail.
Tyra Banks a.k.a The Loony Bin Model
You're a little bit cool and a little bit crazy, but you know your shiz so it's all good. You’re respected in this business for the umpteen years you’ve dedicated to it so you ALWAYS have the last word. You can save either yourself or another player from two night kills. You may save the same player twice. Work those smize, girl.
Tom Cruise a.k.a The Town Holy Roller
You were the best of the best, Maverick, then you started jumping on couches and it all went downhill. Thanks for releasing Joey Potter back into the world.
*secret*
Abby Lee Miller a.k.a Town Loudmouth and Talent Scout
We love to hate you. You make little girls cry and grown women beg for your approval but they keep coming back for more…and paying you for it.
*secret*
Chuck Bass a.k.a The Town Bad Boy Rehabilitated
You’ve got it all, money, looks, money, a heart of gold, and a jet. No longer the bass-hole, you’re one sexy mother-chucker. If the love of your life, Blair, successfully finds you, you will both receive BTSC.
*secret*
Blair Waldorf a.k.a The Spoiled Romantic Princess
Queen B, you’ve got the man, the clothes, and the best apartment on the Upper East Side. You are the queen of scheme so you may investigate one player every odd night. If you find your soul mate, Chuck, you will both receive BTSC. If you find Charlie Sheen, he will become a member of the town. XOXO.
*secret*
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The Mafia a.k.a. The Fake Celebs
Kody Brown a.k.a Keep It In Your Pants
STOP. HAVING. KIDS. You have 4 wives and we’re pretty sure they all want to knife you in your sleep.
*secret*
Jenelle Evans a.k.a. Kieeefaaaaaa’s Girl
Ehhh you're pretty much a lost cause. Sorry dude. We hope you get therapy. Jace is sooo cute though! Don’t ever leave Teen Mom---you make the rest of us feel like we win at parenting.
Kim Kardashian a.k.a Special K
You and your annoying family are a disgrace to the human race. I mean no offense or anything, but come on…we’re all tired of seeing your super-sized ass already. Just stay inside your house. Forever.
*secret*
Indy:
Charlie Sheen a.k.a WINNING
Sometimes you’re awesome, and sometimes you snort cocaine and f*ck hookers...so beware...You can kill who you want on odd nights BUT if you are investigated, you will become part of whichever team finds you and will lose your killing powers. If no one finds you, then you win on your own. Huzzah! Hookers and coke for lyfe!